Posts in Series for HelenKay Dimon
- Make Me Believe
- What’s Your Definition Of Lucky?
- It’s A Dog’s Life
When it comes to my writing life, I’m a lurker. Call it fear. Call it an introvert issue. Whatever it is, it means I usually blend into the background and listen. Of course, every now and then I overhear something that makes my head pop off my shoulders. What follows is a semi-actual conversation I overheard at a writer’s conference. Yeah, I left my house to meet with other writers. It was a shock to me too. The statements aren’t exact quotes but are darn close. And, really, I showed up because Kate Duffy was there and anyone who knows me knows I’ve made it my life’s mission to stalk (in a non-violent way) this poor woman until she BUYS something I’ve written.
There were two published authors - we’ll call them Anne (because that’s not her real name) and Sue (because I’ve tried to wipe her real name from my memory), and two unpubbeds who we’ll call unpubbed #1 and unpubbed #2 ( I have no idea if they even have names). The conversation went something like this:
SUE: I really miss being unpubbed, don’t you? Everything was so easy back then.
ANNE: Absolutely. That was the life.
UNPUBBED #1: Huh?
UNPUBBED #2: < frown >
SUE: You guys are so lucky. You don’t really know how lucky.
ANNE: Definitely. Very lucky. I miss those days.
UNPUBBED #1: But…
UNPUBBED #2: < scowling >
Now, don’t send 106 emails about how getting published doesn’t solve all your problems. I get that. I honestly do. Getting published is not a ticket to the Promised Land. Everyone has issues. The insecurities and pressures of writing life don’t disappear overnight just because someone is under contract with a publisher. That all makes sense. The above conversation doesn’t. My point - you are published. You’ve conquered that step. Don’t underestimate that accomplishment. But, don’t underestimate how annoying it is as an unpubbed to hear a pubbed yearn for the old days. Do published folks really miss the unending wait for a response? The wondering if anyone will ever find you good enough for THE CALL? The endless parade of contests and rejections? The not knowing?
Yeah, that’s the life. Very lucky.
No, HelenKay, I don’t miss wondering if I’ll ever get THE CALL and I’m very relieved to be out of the contest circuit. But the neverending wait for a response still exists on this side of the fence. So do rejections and not knowing. There are plenty of obstacles to face once published, but getting past the first CALL does make things more bearable.
I would never tell someone to be happy unpubbed. The drive for publication is what keeps a writer going, before and after that first CALL.
by SylviaI’m really twisted and sick, but I missed contests for a LONG time, LOL! I think it’s because I won or placed in most everything I entered (okay, it was mostly the same two or three manuscripts, LOL!) making it a huge validation. So anytime I’d be waiting to hear from an editor, I’d scan the RWR for contests that pubb’d authors could enter. I’m sick, yes, I admit it! Thankfully, I’ve gotten over that, LOL!
by Alison March 18th, 2005 at 8:22 amyes, we’re LUCKY to be unpubbed. Lucky.:roll: Now I know you trade one kind of angst for another when you get pubbed…but I REALLY want to hold my published book in my hands. Plus, you only get one “The call”.
I admire the fact you didn’t haul off and…well never mind…
And that’s what you get to leaving your house
Sylvia…when I first tried to post this comment it wouldn’t take my code..even though it was correct. the code was /1/002 I haven’t seen one with /’s before.
by kacey March 18th, 2005 at 8:44 amAlison - I always knew you weren’t well
I think the reason this still plays in my mind is that these folks were sitting there with two unpublished folks who were clearly upset by the conversation and still they chatted on about being so “lucky” not to be published. All I kept thinking was - know thy audience. Or, to put it another way, think this stuff, fine, but don’t say it in mixed company or people will think you’re an idiot. I still can’t see the one woman’s books without cringing.
by HelenKay March 18th, 2005 at 8:45 amKacey - I think the / is a 7 - I had that too. And, yes, if I stayed home I would not have had to take blood pressure pills.
by HelenKay March 18th, 2005 at 8:47 amOkay I’ll admit, like Alison I miss the contests … But I do NOT miss sitting on the edge of my seat waiting for the call. And tell me, am I the only one with eyesight so bad that I can never see which numbers are in the code???? It usually takes me a few tries, LOL …
by Jill March 18th, 2005 at 10:05 amDevil’s advocate: I miss contests too. I didn’t realize how much until I couldn’t enter them anymore.
Like Sylvia said, the waiting doesn’t stop once you’re published, especially if you’re newly published. Nor do the rejections. They just have a bigger impact. Unpublished authors worry about ever getting published and published authors worry about getting the chance to publish again. I’ve realized this is the stage that actually weeds out many writers. You’re published, but you’re not really established. Your career can go either way and there’s not a whole helluva lot you can do about it beyond writing the best book you can.
I personally wouldn’t have had that conversation in front of two unpublished authors, but I do understand where the published authors were coming from. They miss the ‘fun’ part of writing.
by Jordan March 18th, 2005 at 10:31 amI have to wonder who thinks that getting the call is the answer to all their problems. I think anyone with any sense realizes that you are trading one set of problems for another. But that’s the goal. I WANT that set of problems.
Reminds me of adults who tell children to enjoy their childhood because they don’t have responsibility and they can spend all day playing. Adults who say, “I wish I were a child again.” Well, not me. I wouldn’t go back to my childhood for anything. I MUCH prefer being an adult. So I may very well MUCH prefer being a published author! *g*
And LUCKY? If being published is so awful, they can always quit.
by Larissa March 18th, 2005 at 11:10 amI agree with HelenKay. Being published(or newly published) is an affirmation of those hours you spent, typing out a story you weren’t sure was right, or was good, or was readable. Each level of the publishing world–from being unpublished to newly published to three years under your belt to ten years–each comes with a new and different level of responsibility, but being unpublished doesn’t mean a lack a type of responsibility that a published author may have. I recognize and acknowledge the responsiblity I will have when I do sell, but I’ll refrain from looking back because it would only hinder me from accepting and carrying my new responsibility.
by Evangeline March 18th, 2005 at 11:11 amUm. Wow. I love being published! It rocks! Yes, my job is more complicated now and I didn’t get more hours in a day to accommodate that, but I expected that.
There is no thrill like The Call. Or seeing your work for sale for the first time. It’s huge.
by Charlene March 18th, 2005 at 8:10 pmGreat post Helen! Frankly, if I were one of those unpubbed authors, I’d be offended. It comes off very diva-ish and condescending (or I’m taking it totally out of context).
(and I”m not saying being published makes it not fun anymore–this is what I get for blog hopping at 4 AM 
) but like everyone else has said each level brings it’s own set of issues to deal with, whether you’re just starting out, on the cusp of selling or a NY Times bestselling author.
by cece March 19th, 2005 at 2:31 amLarissa I love your analogy! Unfortunately I don’t think you have to be published to lose that fun feeling
Well said, HelenKay! I’m ready and willing to trade one set of problems for another. Immediately.
Not that I’m impatient or anything.:wink:
by Steph T. March 19th, 2005 at 5:57 amI sort of get the meaning, but . . . if I ever say anything like that in front of any unpubbed, the unpubbed — whether she knows me or not — is allowed to thump me longside the head. Seriously.
by kate March 19th, 2005 at 5:25 pm